***DISCLAIMER: Men have their problems too, don't get me wrong, but they don't control people just to prove that they can control people.***

Still no camera since the boss lost our last one, so no real meat of a review to be done on the SW1911 DX, which is a shame because its a rather lovely gun. Even more lovely is the Beretta Scoremaster I snagged on the same delivery, and paid £100 in lovely HMR&C's `enjoyment taxes`, as I like to think of them But more on theses as I can actually get the gear and the gumption.

I did want to do something on the other few things I got the other day, especially the Thompson, but still a lack of camera hinders me. Well not really, but convenient excuses are too few and far between to waste.

But still we have something to talk about, and if I let myself drift off into a vitriolic rant about the eeeeeevillll domineering nature of my best friend's (Jason's) girlfriend then just please let yourself out of the back door and come back in a few days when I've calmed down I hope I'm only kidding...

The aftermath of thee mightye Hog Roast brought this on; Well I didn't really get my *albartroth* into gear about tidying up afterwards did I? So although the sleeper seating and all the equipment is long gone, we still had the brick fire-pit in the garden that did the actual roasting while the hog hovered above, and as I was going to get them ready to collect from the front of the house anyway Il Parentos (the 'rents), in their infinte wisdom/cruelty also roped me into cutting their hedge. Sounds easy enough but its 9-feet high and 80-feet long, so it was a bit of a mission even to cut the top.

Whatever negativity one could glean from being given a load of uninspiring jobs when you already had a firm idea of what you wanted to achieve in mind for that particular day is tempered by the sight of your mates sitting inside the top of a Leylandii hedge at the back of your garden; each in turn gleefully wielding a gunning hedge-trimmer with one hand while balancing their weight on a branch fit only for balancing unheavy things on, like small birds and not people. Really, not people, not at all.

Pretty entertaining really, and surprisingly enjoyable when you have a go yourself (apart from the branch that wanted to get rather intrusively personal with me ).

But the main thing, the whole point of Sunday existing this week as far as me and my mate were concerned, was brewing up some whisky mash ready to sit to ferment. Now with a few things to do and half a dozen people between myself and the few friends who came round to help, one person did f-all towards anything (although everyone there was at the Hog Roast and had an equal share in everything then) and the same person also made Jason leave before the Whisky mash was complete (thus largely defeating the point of our mission; one we've been planning for a few weeks), before the 8-person dinner my parents had benevolently (well they are Hardcore Christians ) laid on for everyone (making them waste their time doing so, to a certain extent) and all citing the reason "She has so much to do back at home" even though she couldn't actually think of a single thing when Jas asked her to. Can you guess who it is yet?

.....and relax....

I had to say that somewhere folks, the *fruitcage* ing cheek of it, honestly. Its another nail in the coffin for ME ever having any kind of meaningful relationship except on my terms : and my terms alone. Mankind's greatest ability is to learn from the experience of others, and I definitely ain't slacking in this particular field;

The thing I have lately realised is that women, in relationships that they are taking seriously, generally want someone they can control by their own behaviour and therefore predict completely, absolutely 100%. And men go along with all their ridiculous demands for `the sake of a quite life` Quite the opposite in casual flings and suchlike, but complete automaton controllability is what most women want, and is what most women get, in long-term relationships - especially in marriage. Throwing miniature tantrums because they aren't getting (yet) what they unreasonably want and displaying totally unnacceptable behaviour to get their dumb beaus to cave in to their demands, once again, is what its all too often about with `relationship women` because they then have a situation they are in total charge of and can manipulate to their will.

*fruitcage* that for a game of soldiers!

-

Goddamnit where was I? Yeah the new toys - pretty cool, in fact very cool they be. The Scoremaster is so perfectly balanced it deserves new pride of place in my Beretta collection (above the M8045, at last ) and its as accurate as hell as well (or at least very, very easy to hold steady), and the SW1911 just needs a new trigger, possibly a new hammer as well, and its gonna make one hell of a display piece to go with it

The only things I really need now are dischargers;

batteries that work;

spare goggles for 6 people;

spare holsters for 6 people;

a bloody charger that bloody works;

some more tan gear;

money;

more money;

the ability to drive without going through any more lessons;

to design more new tattoos;

getting a select few of these new tattoos;

maybe getting some of the older designs as well/instead;

my hair dreaded (as in: have it made into dreadlocks, not to have it reverentially feared across the land and the seas);

less guilt at cancelling a BBQ this weekend to go to a poker game somewhere else;

to be a bit less of a c*** to my good friends by not cancelling stuff thats been planned for a while;

...and, an assistant at work to do half the bull**** that I end up doing (to the detriment of my proper duties);

Air-Con!!!

- And the world will truly be a wonderful place! lol