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amateurstuntman

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Everything posted by amateurstuntman

  1. amateurstuntman

    SIG Picture Thread

    Merged into one. Sig pistols and rifles
  2. amateurstuntman

    SIG Picture Thread

    I can answer that, I sold him the gun and it has no upgrade parts what so ever, except the long barrel and full cylinder I stuck in it for the 556 kit.
  3. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    This person, I always cut between the wall and the bush to get to her front door, it knocks 30 seconds off my walk but now she has put a big bit of wood there. She could have just asked. Miserable *badgeress*.
  4. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    Euro people wanted to make a standard letter box at a standard height. The post office and the union thought it was a great idea but the government vetoed it saying it would cost taxpayers too much money. On my walk I have a twat who has steps down to his house and a tiny landing at the bottom that isn't big enough to stand in, so there I am standing on the bottom step with his letters looking for his bloody box. Then I notice it is below the bottom step. WTF! I would love a few leaflets like: I hate your dog, you can collect your mail at the depot. Your letter box is ######, you can collect your mail at the depot. The stinking plate of cat food on your doorstep attracts flies and foxes and means your garden is full of *beep*, you can collect your mail at the depot. The address on your letter is wrong, either the people who write to you are monumentally stupid or you told them the wrong address because you are an idiot, you can't collect your mail at the depot, I threw it in the bin. Someone hasn't put your house number on this letter, I had to go through 500 bloody addresses to find your house, I hate you. If your front door was open I would have *beep* on your sofa. I have thrown your bloody parcel through your open window because it won't go through your letterbox, would you rather go into town to collect it? Stop bloody moaning. My manager told me you complained about me, get a stick and meet me in your garden. I will be the one stripped to the waist and covered in the blood of the last person who complained about me. *edit* One more. Dear occupant, you might notice that your postman has cut a huge hole in your front door with a jigsaw. This is because you are a selfish idiot. If you wish to complain please get in a bath full of water with your phone and an activated three bar electric fire, the phone will dial the post office automatically for you when the fire hits the water.
  5. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    Don't get me started on letterboxes. Small ones, powerful springs, ones right down on the ground and the bloody vertical ones. Worst is people who have a cage inside their house to catch the letters but it is too bloody small and you can't get the leters all the way through. people who have bushes growing over their letterbox too. Do me a favour, go to your front door right now and without bending over (or it crumpling up on impact) slide a single letter through the box with one hand and put a solid piece of wood 353mm by 250mm by 25mm through with one hand if you can't then please shoot yourself in the head. Also, try to arrange a place to leave parcels. If you don't have one of those you don't have to kill yourself but please dear god stop buying everything off bloody e-bay and go to the shops once in a while. Also before you complain to my boss please think. If every day your letters are screwed into a little ball the reason could be that your letter box is bloody evil, try putting something through yourself. If it bites your fingers and shreds your letters then it's not my bloody fault. Also if you have three letterboxes on your house and you only want us to use one of them then brick up the others, it's not that hard. Finally, if you are expecting a parcel try to get to the door within 8 bloody hours. If you get a docket don't forget that it takes a while to write one out and we would rather get rid of the bloody thing. Don't forget that if we don't deliver it we then have to carry it for up to 45 minutes - trust me we would rather get rid of the bloody thing. If you get a lot of packets and have a job, write to your depot and ask them to keep all your parcels and just send a docket, that way you can go down to the post office and get it the moment you get in from work rather than waiting until the following day. None of this matters if you have - at my request - kindly shot yourself though.
  6. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    Hitman, he can get WA parts but they are apparently a total pain in the *albartroth*. I had a bit of a 1911 IED 6" that was just as rare as you like but I think he might have changed his policy since then. I will send him a kidney if he can fix my Shorty .40 Got the extractor thing sorted though:
  7. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    My beloved betrothed dropped my WA S&W M4013 TSW "Shorty .40" (bit of a mouth-full) a while ago and cracked the slide. Grrrrr She offered to pay for it to be repaired :-) I found a retailer with a complete Prime slide and frame set for it. Mmmm rarealicious. My other half even offered to pay for the metal kit for my Xmas pressie (I know it's July) So I am now a happy ginge, I had to wait a while as Keith was going to get it for me and add it onto a big rsov order I was doing and I had to wait until I had all the money. Waiting, grrrrr Then when he sent out the bulk of the package the other retailer still hadn't given him the kit, more waiting, grrrrrrr. It arrived yesterday but the extractor wasn't in the box and when I fitted the kit the slide stop (which, unknown to me, had been cracked when she dropped the gun) snapped. Now I have a beautiful full metal Shorty .40 with no extractor and an epoxied slide stop. I am devastated. I e-mailed Keith and I am sure his super customer service will sort the extractor problem out very quickly and I have e-mailed leonard to get a new slide stop but you know what? It's more bloody waiting, grrrrrrrr
  8. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    I hate meat in my gristle and potato pies. When those blokes stop me I say "Can't stop mate, I've got a bone in my leg" Always works.
  9. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    Don't worry. As soon as one kid heelys under a bus they will be banned. That or the nanny state will ban busses.
  10. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    You should have tried going to university when I did. My parents wouldn't give me any cash - fair enough it is theirs. The government wouldn't give me any cash - fair enough, my parents both had jobs. I worked 50hrs a week in Burger King to pay the most of it, got into 18,000 pounds worth of debt which I only finished paying off last year. I got thrown out of uni and evicted - fair enough I owed them a whack load of money. I got sacked - fair enough I smashed the manager in his smug face. I got dumped - fair enough I lied to her about the extent of my money problems. but wait... When I was in my darkest hour I asked a friend to lend me money to get a shirt and clean my trousers so I could go to a job interview. He said "I can't, I need to buy a new R-C car, the old one is a bit tatty" I bloody hate students, no grip on reality, no idea about the value of anything, no idea what hard work is about. Then they have the cheek to complain that their bed in halls is a bit lumpy. Those rooms are better than squaddies serving their country get. Bloody leeches. Uni courses should last 5 years, not 4 and one day a week students should work down coal mines with picks and shovels to pay their way.
  11. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    I get up at five to four, it's nice to be able to see where I am going. In the north of Scotland, where I'm from, you can get as little as three hours of true night in summer.
  12. amateurstuntman

    My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!

    apartheid
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