Pants of Death Posted April 16, 2007 Report Share Posted April 16, 2007 Are you a Democrat, Republican, or Southerner? Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock 23 .357 auto, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do? .................................................. .............. Democrat's Answer: Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor! Or oppressed? Have I ever done any thing to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? What does the law say about this situation? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behaviour. .................................................. ............. Republican's Answer: BANG! BANG! (double tap) .................................................. ............ Southerner's Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! (slide locks back)..... (Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! (slide locks back) Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Black Talon or Glaser pre-frag? Son: "Can I shoot the next one!" Wife: "You Ain't Taking That To The Taxidermist!" Link to post Share on other sites
dannyboy Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 I can see that offending so many people Link to post Share on other sites
sekiryu Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 Looks like I'm a Republican....I don't waste ammo. Link to post Share on other sites
Pants of Death Posted April 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 Yeah, it just cracks me up. I'm already a Republican and I'm a fan double taps, but I wouldn't stess over someone emptying the mag. Link to post Share on other sites
Sledge Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 How did you get a Glock 23 in .357? How was he firing 16 rounds per reload? Link to post Share on other sites
sekiryu Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 Probably meant Glock 32, which does have a 15/17 round optional magazine. Link to post Share on other sites
Sledge Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 Still doesn't explain the 16 round reload. Either the guy is using 17 round mags which he loads one round short; or after emptying the gun the first time, he reloaded, dropped the mag and loaded another round into it before resuming firing. Link to post Share on other sites
Pants of Death Posted April 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 I didn't write this. But a Glock 23 comes in .357 Sig. I stand corrected, no, it's the 32 that's a .357. But Slegde darling, don't read into it so much. Link to post Share on other sites
Pants of Death Posted April 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 And whenever target shooting (with my kimber, mind you) I load six shots instead of seven for two reasons: 1) Even number for double taps. 2) Loading a mag a round or two short of its full capacity will improve its life expectancy. Link to post Share on other sites
sekiryu Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 Still doesn't explain the 16 round reload. Either the guy is using 17 round mags which he loads one round short; or after emptying the gun the first time, he reloaded, dropped the mag and loaded another round into it before resuming firing. Either 15 rounders or 17 rounders are available. So it could have been a 15 rounder, with an additional round in the chamber. Link to post Share on other sites
Pants of Death Posted April 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 Ugh. But then who would take the time to put the additional round in the chamber for the second mag??? Stop reading into it guys! Link to post Share on other sites
Kyrian_Zenda Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 Welcome to Arnies Link to post Share on other sites
Kousnik Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 Welcome to Arnies <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Yep, you know your on an airsoft board. Link to post Share on other sites
Samm Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 I thought Republicans and Southerners were the same thing? Link to post Share on other sites
Kyrian_Zenda Posted April 17, 2007 Report Share Posted April 17, 2007 Yep, you know your on an airsoft board.<{POST_SNAPBACK}> My post had nothing to do with that. I was referring to Sledge reading too deeply into things in an attempt to bring even more levity to a humourous thread and the OPs inability to recognise this. Hence Welcome to Arnies. Link to post Share on other sites
Sledge Posted April 18, 2007 Report Share Posted April 18, 2007 I was referring to Sledge reading too deeply into things in an attempt to bring some levity to an unhumourous thread and the OPs inability to recognise this. Hence Welcome to Arnies. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Fixed. Link to post Share on other sites
Woodco Posted April 18, 2007 Report Share Posted April 18, 2007 Smashing, good find Link to post Share on other sites
Pants of Death Posted April 18, 2007 Author Report Share Posted April 18, 2007 Ha! No Samm, not the same. I suppose it would be better labeled "Democrat, Republican, or Redneck". And New Orleans (just one of many), one of the bluest cities in the union is also located in the deep south, so you can't say Southerners and Republicans are the same. Oh yeah, and I'm a California Republican, relocated to Oregon. Link to post Share on other sites
Md0ggyd0g Posted April 19, 2007 Report Share Posted April 19, 2007 funny, but older than the big bang theory. Link to post Share on other sites
amateurstuntman Posted April 19, 2007 Report Share Posted April 19, 2007 Yep, you know you're on an airsoft board. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Fixed. Welcome to Arnie's Link to post Share on other sites
Samm Posted April 19, 2007 Report Share Posted April 19, 2007 I have sex with dolphins in their blowhole. Welcome to Arnie's <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Fixed. Welcome to Arnies Link to post Share on other sites
Sledge Posted April 19, 2007 Report Share Posted April 19, 2007 My girlfriend has a penis. It's bigger than mine. Welcome to Arnies <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Fixed. Link to post Share on other sites
Samm Posted April 19, 2007 Report Share Posted April 19, 2007 *beep* Link to post Share on other sites
nautilus Posted April 19, 2007 Report Share Posted April 19, 2007 There are some threads you should just not come into halfway through. I'll get me coat..... Link to post Share on other sites
Flakdragon Posted April 25, 2007 Report Share Posted April 25, 2007 Am I a super liberal if I use the gun to knock him unconscious and then take care of him to show him how great America is and nurse him to good health? Link to post Share on other sites
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