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Schnitzel with noodles - what made you smile today?


amateurstuntman

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I was a mighty cadet at school.

 

You had a *suitcase* day at the range if you hadn't been swept several times by either the private Pyle types who exuded grease and idiocy in equal measures, or a member of the attractive set who was more worried about her make-up than killing a fellow pupil...

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Ah those were the days. Being taught unarmed combat (I saw this phased out in my career days, eventually ended up playing football instead...lame) and survival skills by the local Ghurkas, all of whom were absolutely lovely personalities but commanded respect.

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You military guys are lucky.

 

Us civvies don't get to beat the apprentices/idiot colleagues any more.

 

 

I got my beatings as a lad, and now I'm a manager I can't beat my lad for his *fruitcage* ups.

 

No wonder the world's going to *suitcase*.

I don't know.. My mentor does well to give me *suitcase*. Had 5th Wheel grease down by boxers, chained to the fence in the rain etc.. The other apprentices here get similar treatment..

 

In fairness though we all see it as either a case of having earned it or light hearted banter so don't complain, maybe the management just turns a blind eye.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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My lock was a thatcham gold inch thick steel cable with a heavy lock that got me a discount on my scooter insurance and usually it went through both wheels and the rack it definitely was too much hassle to pinch plus when someone tried to push me off my bike and steal it in york and he took the lock to the testicles it solved the issue. And once the boy used it when he got jumped one night in york fairly effectively.

 

You in York often, Paranoid? For some reason I always had you down in my mind as being from London somewhere.

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We never got unarmed combat. Or Gurkhas.

 

:(

 

 

I was 36 Engineer, we had over 200 of them.

Somehow the one I hated the most works in my office.

 

I don't know.. My mentor does well to give me *suitcase*. Had 5th Wheel grease down by boxers, chained to the fence in the rain etc.. The other apprentices here get similar treatment..

 

In fairness though we all see it as either a case of having earned it or light hearted banter so don't complain, maybe the management just turns a blind eye.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

Hazing.

 

People have tried that on me in the past but boarding school came to the rescue again.

First day introduction goes like this:

 

"Hi, I'm Andrew.  Call me Ginge.  I don't understand or use subtle language.  If you want me to do or stop doing something, ask.  If you try to bully or haze me I will *fruitcage* you up and get another job."

 

The level of acceptable incompetence with firearms in the Engineers when I was in was astonishing.

911 had only just happened and the Army was at the end of a long period where the only credible threat we faced was Irish guys.

 

I saw Weapon Handling Tests redone back-to-back for an hour until it was done "close enough" on the floor of a bus on the way to the range.

I was put in lane 9 and told to shoot at 10 after a guy failed his APWT 5 times on the bounce.

 

The worthless piece of *suitcase* hit 2 targets and got a better score than me that day (I missed one shooting for myself and 1 for him, that he hit.  He fired 6 shots at it.).

 

The first time I ever saw a GPMG I was handed one to clean on an exercise, found a live round in the barrel and was threatened with a charge for an illegal strip after I pulled apart the de-linking mechanism.

At that point the badge found out about the round and that I wasn't trained and went through the full-screw responsible like a dose of the *suitcases*.

The full-screw tried to give me a one-finger debrief for "grassing" so I snapped it.

 

Support troops didn't get SUSAT when I was in but I had one due to being on the Regi shooting team, almost every time I went to sign out my rifle or LMG I found that the armourer had removed it from the rifle or, on one occasion, issued my rifle to some other guy.

 

That is why I am the only guy to enter the Parachute cup with a non-SUSAT L86 and as far as I know the only guy to hit 5/5 shots on a fig. 12 at 500m on irons.

 

Worthless *beep*.

 

 

Happy thread:

EVGA 1080 Classified expected Wednesday...

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That's damn good shooting.

 

I was on our school team, and we shot fig 12 out to 300 on irons and thought that was tricky at the time :)

 

Cheers, coudn't do it now.

Eyesight isn't good enough any more.

 

Our shooting team captain would have marmalised anyone who messed with our rifles (we had special Shooting Team ones which were not used for any other purpose).

 

Although I was under the impression that LSWs always had SUSATs, regardless of unit.

 

That's right, except jungle use and (in this case) NBC exercises.

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I put orange juice in my Alpen when I was really tired one morning.  Seemed a shame to waste the Alpen so I poured out as much OJ as I could then poured the milk.  FYI, it did not taste nice at all.

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I read that as custard.

 

Considered it.  I would eat that.

 

 

The basis of my government would be exactly that.

Hire the best people.

 

Kill them when they fail me.

 

I'm kidding.

 

Probably.

 

Hire the best people, keep them in job long enough to actively participate change, and have a decent enough chance of both coming up with new ideas, implementing them and monitoring their success.

 

Exile them if they fail.

 

I had custard on chips once.

 

Picked up the wrong jug in the canteen, and had to plough through them with bravado.

 

Didn't taste half bad.

 

Custard's weird - sometimes I like it, sometimes I can't stand it, sometimes I crave it.

 

I put orange juice in my Alpen when I was really tired one morning.  Seemed a shame to waste the Alpen so I poured out as much OJ as I could then poured the milk.  FYI, it did not taste nice at all.

 

I know people that don't have milk on weetabix, just orange juice.

 

Just.... why?

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The basis of my government would be exactly that.

Hire the best people.

 

Kill them when they fail me.

 

I'm kidding.

 

Probably.

Starship Troopers.

 

"you're my new 'x', until I kill you, or find someone better."

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