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Schnitzel with noodles - what made you smile today?

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It's really simple people.   Scorch is right, the My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch! thread (although a great place to get out the stresses of the day) is very negative, let us celebrate the things that hav

Stepped out into the garden 15 minutes ago; Found out nature had used a bucket, some H20 and some cold to produce me an awesome plinking target;    

Current girlfriend is just about perfect. Super intelligent, is a doctor (so helpful, if the Russians invade and we need to start a guerilla war), absolutely filthy in the bedroom and when she's upset

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My Grenade fitness starter pack came in today, can't wait to try the stuff out. Inb4 it doesn't work and is just a bunch of media spin.


Also bike lights should be delivered today so I can actually ride my damn bike to and from work without risking a fine and minimising risk to myself.

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TBH they are very, very expensive for what it is. If you are around 12% bf and want to get "ripped" fair enough but personally I wouldn't spend that money on it, it's caffeine and green tea (I would advise against drinking caffeinated drinks alongside this stuff) and some other stuff.  Will increase your metabolism by a bit, but not by nearly as much as a weight training session, which ideally you should be doing anyway.


imo if you are going down the fat burning route, go with an ephedrine & caffeine stack, but I really don't recommend this. When you hear about bodybuilders etc dieing of heart failure, more often then not it's because of fat burning aids, not steroids.


cheers and good luck + come to the exercise thread ! 


edit: https://www.myfitnesspal.com/ if you havn't seen already is great. 

Edited by Skarclaw
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Aye got my fitness pal linked up with my Garmin account.


I'm not interested in getting ripped, just want to slim down really as I dislike my current figure. Currently in size 38-40 trousers (40 mainly because I keep blowing the crotch out on formal trousers which aren't designed for bar work) and I'd like to go down to at least 36 again.

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But a small 500l cylinder isn't actually a bad question? External dimensions =/= capacity and all that.


Winter air for tyres is a good one though ;)

We normally specify shorter or slimmer if we are referring to external dimensions. Smaller would denote capacity.


I'm struggling to find more plumbing/tool specific ones.

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Spots for the spot welder.


Sparks for the grinder.


New bubbles for the spirit levels.


Adjustable spanner - when they come back with one say 'no, a metric one' and send them back.


Send them to the nearest bakery for 'brazen tarts' (warn the bakers first, though)


Send them to the nearest garage for a mechanic's clip. The garage mechanic should give them a quick clip 'round the ear and send 'em back. (Not sure if you can get away with that these days though)


Bucket of steam.


Box of ice making solution.


Packet of dehydrated water.

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This may not work anymore but my old favourite was ask him if he fancies a dip in the typing pool in front of said group of secretaries.


When I got asked for Chem light batteries I sat and opened up 50 Chem lights in an out of the way place and came back with a Baggie full of the inner guts of the lights.


If you want a real giggle ask him to test the largest water tank you have access to for soft spots. Hand him a rubber mallet and a piece of chalk and tell him to mark the bits with a hollow echo.


Could always ask him to find a fuel additive so you can run unleaded gas for your portable soldering/brazing Tools or a toothbrush for cleaning your crocodile clips.


And for the more modern style pranks ask him to get you a quote for pens with the company logo on from the usual supplier, Pen Island.com


Also tink you made me laugh with the card idea so thanks.

Edited by paranoiddroid
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New TV started/starting makes me happy. 


The Strain


You're The Worst

From Dusk Till Dawn

Masters of Sex


South Park

American Horror Story

Brooklyn Nine Nine

New Girl

Modern Family

Red Dwarf

The Blacklist

Z Nation

Bob's Burgers


Hawaii Five-0

Family Guy

The Last Man on Earth

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Do you own a money tree or a diamond mine or something?


Are you referring to the buying of the Elite or the giving away of the wired ones?


I do okay for money and my outgoings are reasonable.  I like to spend money on my hobbies.


Computers, SCUBA, bikes, airsoft and cars where possible.


I don't drink, smoke, drive to work, wear fashionable clothes or have children or pets.


Got to spend it on something.



The wired ones are better because there are no batteries or dongles, you download the driver, plug it in and off you go.

I will be using the Elite in wired mode.

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