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My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!


Sledge

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All you lot whinging about the occasional bad drivers in the UK should try driving out here in Saudi! It isn't just the occasional bad driver, it's a whole nation. I refuse to drive in Riyadh. I also saw a kid, can't have been any older than 8 driving on a main road. I nearly shat myself watching that, especially when he pulled out onto the main road as cars were doing 160kph past.

 

My biggest gripe this last day or so is the psycho (ex)girlfriend. I finally got rid and feel so much better for it.

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Facebook 'Targeted' advertising.

 

I keep getting adverts for farmville. As if i give a flying *fruitcage* about starting a virtual farm, and raising virtual animals, and growing virtual crops. In that space of time i'd waste on it, i could earn enough money to buy a small piece of land, some chickens, and some crops, and grow them. And probably get enough eggs to sell to buy a pack of cigarettes. *fruitcage* off, Farmville. Truly, just *fruitcage* off.

 

Mafia wars. Why the flying bat*fruitcage* would you actively encourage children from the age of 10 and up to 'Call a hit on your friend!' or 'Run the biggest crime ring around!'. FOR *fruitcage*S SAKE, FACEBOOK. Knife crime is an epidemic. Gun crime is also a big issue in this current world. What the *fruitcage* are you thinking advertising a game that encourages kids to play at being a ruthless, murdering criminal? Are you *fruitcage* NUTS? Hey i know! Here's a great idea; Let's make a facebook game that gives all the young wannabe gangsters of the day all the ideas and information they need on starting a *fruitcage* mob? It's bad enough they've figured out which end of a knife is the sharp one, without you *fruitcage* numpties giving them ideas.

 

Zoosk, whatever the *fruitcage* that name is supposed to mean - Yes, facebook. I'd love to bone that stunning, girl next door looking chick you've got in the picture there. Problem is, of course, that despite your assurances, that girl doesn't know i exist, and probably doesn't want to date me. On top of that, why the *fruitcage* would a girl that fine be resorting to the sheer desperation of internet dating? Do you think i'm some kind of *fruitcage* mug? Do you really think i'm going to start throwing credit card numbers at you on the premise that stunning women will knock my junk around? *fruitcage* off. Just *fruitcage* off, on a permanent basis. *fruitcage* OFF, TARGETED ADVERTISING, YOU *fruitcage* *fruitcage*RUNT.

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On top of that, why the *fruitcage* would a girl that fine be resorting to the sheer desperation of internet dating?

 

Don't you know the rule.

 

The hot ones find it hard to get a man because:

 

A. All the guys are too scared they are out of here league to ask.

B. If she asks she is called a slut by her peers when all she wants is a relationship.

 

But honestly i have a mate who uses about 3 dating sites and bugger me there are some mighty fine women on them, they may just have social issues or that whole 'i'm not that good looking' thing. Or they may be feed up with *albartrotheth*.

 

Can't rule it out.

 

;)

 

But i agree with the rest, Farmville / Mafia Wars / Evony can all lick my *suitcase*.

 

'FireKnife'

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Just a quick hark back to the subject of roads, I hate drivers who see an L plate on a scooter and assume I *must* be going 30mph, and they couldn't possibly be behind me. Even if I am actually doing over the speed limit like a naughty boy, they go tearing past like I'm holding them back. Seriously guys, if you got that much of an issue with being behind a scooter then you must have some severe personal issues or something to prove.

 

 

Councils. If its gonna be icy or snowy, put down grit. And while you're at it, either fix the damn potholes, or buy me an MT350 so they won't bother me.

 

(Sorry for this one Guzzi)

Bus companies. (I'm looking at you, Stagecoach) I live in a village just outside of Northampton, but still on a fairly busy route as it services several villages and goes on to Kettering. So why does it cost less to get the bus to Wellingborough than it does to get home?

Town -> home = 6 miles.

Town -> Wellingborough = 15 miles.

Ridiculous.

I'm sure they're making the profit off the few young people on the bus route to cover the masses of old people with free bus passes.

 

Sodding old people. Fill up the bus, don't have to pay, guilt trip me out of my seat and always crack me in the shins with those basteward shopping trolleys... And on top of that they usually smell of musty cupboards or Avon products.

 

Lay off the perfume, the bus is starting to rival a nazi gas chamber.

 

 

And clingy girls. BACK THE HELL UP. We kissed a couple of times, and met up for a drink in the pub. Now you're telling everyone we're in a relationship? WTF?

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Could be worse mate, she could be accusing you of cheating on her with your mate's daughter because she read on facebook "Graeme and Shauni might be coming along too".

 

I fail to see how she could make such a link but she seemed to invent this story in her head that I was shagging my mate's daughter. Extreme paranoia and accusations when another mate's wife added me on facebook and tagged me in some pictures of us all off-roading.

 

Oh she even got all worried and accusing that she couldn't make me cum because I wasn't finished in 5 minutes. Sorry for taking the time to make sure she was getting some satisfaction out of it all.

 

I'm glad to be rid.

 

Oh and when I finished her, she kept emailing me and texting giving me abuse, calling me all sorts and putting at the end "now leave me alone". I wasn't even replying to them.

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1, Just a quick hark back to the subject of roads, I hate drivers who see an L plate on a scooter and assume I *must* be going 30mph, and they couldn't possibly be behind me. Even if I am actually doing over the speed limit like a naughty boy, they go tearing past like I'm holding them back. Seriously guys, if you got that much of an issue with being behind a scooter then you must have some severe personal issues or something to prove.

 

 

2, Councils. If its gonna be icy or snowy, put down grit. And while you're at it, either fix the damn potholes, or buy me an MT350 so they won't bother me.

 

3, (Sorry for this one Guzzi)

Bus companies. (I'm looking at you, Stagecoach) I live in a village just outside of Northampton, but still on a fairly busy route as it services several villages and goes on to Kettering. So why does it cost less to get the bus to Wellingborough than it does to get home?

Town -> home = 6 miles.

Town -> Wellingborough = 15 miles.

Ridiculous.

I'm sure they're making the profit off the few young people on the bus route to cover the masses of old people with free bus passes.

 

4, Sodding old people. Fill up the bus, don't have to pay, guilt trip me out of my seat and always crack me in the shins with those basteward shopping trolleys... And on top of that they usually smell of musty cupboards or Avon products.

 

Lay off the perfume, the bus is starting to rival a nazi gas chamber.

 

 

5, And clingy girls. BACK THE HELL UP. We kissed a couple of times, and met up for a drink in the pub. Now you're telling everyone we're in a relationship? WTF?

1, Once you have to follow one yourself, you'll understand. ;)

 

2, Council tax costs too much already, why raise it, when you can just stay in doors for a few days? Get your new lady freind to come over & keep you company. :D

 

3, Agreed.

 

4, One day (if you are really unlucky) you'll be old & like the scooter thing, you'll understand. :D

 

5, *fruitcage* her so hard she can't walk for a week, break both her legs to make sure, tell all her mates & her mum & dad (if she has one) she's a ######, get a restraining order,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, & she'll still be back for more. :(

 

No, your best bet, is to go out with her every day & treat her like a lady. By the end of the week, she'll be bored of that & dump you, telling her mates you were ###### in bed. Do it, I bet I'm right. ;) After all, she's a woman. <_<

 

 

Greg.

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When I had my old bike I had to follow a 50cc scooter, and the only thing that ticked me off was the way the poor sap on it kept pulling over to the left.

 

I just thought its sad that he's so used to being bullied on the road that he was such a submissive rider.

 

When you're on a bike/scooter you have to dominate your lane to stop people in cars trying to squeeze past to overtake when they really don't have room to do it properly.

 

So yeah, have done it, had the power on my old bike to overtake easily, but it wasn't neccessary for the road we were on so I just bimbled along patiently behind him.

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Whenever I'm on my bike I always try to sneak up on learners (not always easy on a Ducati) then, when I get reeeaaalllly close behind, I'll give it the berries in 2nd and scare the bejeesus out of them.

 

I figure it causes jealousy and helps them focus on passing their test. :P

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Whenever I'm on my bike I always try to sneak up on learners (not always easy on a Ducati) then, when I get reeeaaalllly close behind, I'll give it the berries in 2nd and scare the bejeesus out of them.

 

I figure it causes jealousy and helps them focus on passing their test. :P

These days I feel sorry for them & they rarely frustrate me. Safety first, no wild, unsafe, overtaking maneuvers. In fact, no overtaking at all, unless absolutely necessary.

 

Once upon-a-time, I'd do the patented 'on the back wheel, giving them the bird with the left' overtake, staring menacingly through the black visor, hanging off the bike, keeping the front up as long as they were still in sight.

 

Partly like stealth, partly 'cos I thought it looked cool, partly, 'cos I had to.

 

Mostly 'cos I was a bit of a plonka back then! :(

 

 

Greg.

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TBH, I think most people on learner bikes actually enjoy having "proper" bikers showing off for them.

It makes them think "Yeah! That's gonna be me one day". Least, that's the way it made me feel.

 

What I DON'T like is when bikers act like w*nkers and refuse to wave at learners etc.

Geez, fella's. We were all learners once.

There's few enough bikers on the roads these days that we really can't afford to alienate the next generation so much that they decide to bugger off and buy a Saxo instead.

 

S'funny but I think Ducati owners relate to learners more than most other bikers cos, well, we're both hated by "normal" bikers.

If I ever stop at a cafe or picnic area I always get kids coming up to ask about the bike.

Meanwhile, all the jap bike owners concentrate on ignoring me, probably cos they can't understand why people think a 10 year old Ducati is nicer than their shiny new Gixxer/Blade/R1 etc.

 

Did you know the Ferrari 308 only had 200bhp?

Pretty much any Supra/GTO/Skyline will leave a 308 for dead.

Park a 308 in a car park next to a bunch of jap super-coupes and it'll still get most of the attention.

I think the same applies to Ducati bikes and a lot of jap owners just don't like it. :(

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1, It makes them think "Yeah! That's gonna be me one day". Least, that's the way it made me feel.

 

2, What I DON'T like is when bikers act like w*nkers and refuse to wave at learners etc.

 

3, Saxo.

 

4, S'funny but I think Ducati owners relate to learners more than most other bikers cos, well, we're both hated by "normal" bikers.

1, That's exactly how I felt when I was little but I don't think you can apply that to all. These days, only a small proportion of 50 riders go on to ride anything else, let alone become a hero super biker.

 

I got a great example of this on a visit to le'mans: Pulling out of a multistory, I saw some crash helmets coming up the ramp & saw the opportunity to 'impress'. I did a feet up 540 burn out from my parking spot, rolling burnout for about 10m & popped the front up, deliberately bouncing it off the roof, bought it down & stoppied expecting to take a bow to the crowd's applause. The two rather elderly German, gentlemen, on their on their GS650's, were less than pleased. A complete waste of back tire. :rolleyes:

 

2, How dumb.

 

3, Do they still exist?

 

4, I've been off the scene for a while, is it still like that? I saw a turnaround as far back as '95, when the dukes started to show a strong presence in Le mans. I thought Foggy had changed all the 'anti' & folk had warmed to them? :huh:

 

 

Greg.

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the sheer desperation of internet dating

 

I know it's like a page old now but....

 

...my turn to rant.

 

That's one hell of a broad stereotype.

 

Just to state first, I am neither desperate, nor short on female/male (yes I'll take either :P) company when/if I'm single

 

And yet I met my current gf online, and she happens to be just about the most amazing person I've ever met.

 

So don't stereotype all internet associations as desperate. (though in fairness.....alot are....just not all)

 

Rant over :P

 

Please continue

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Whenever I'm on my bike I always try to sneak up on learners (not always easy on a Ducati) then, when I get reeeaaalllly close behind, I'll give it the berries in 2nd and scare the bejeesus out of them.

 

That's exactly what stopped my wife from continuing on with her scootership. TBH she was probably a bit to timid for a scooter, but big bike screamiung past her was too much. Having said that I only move to the left for big bikes on my 125, as they have a tendency to get too close as they scream by. I find them more worrying than buses and that says something, but that because their manoveurability is more difficult to predict. But they still look way cooler than my Piaggio.

 

 

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And yet I met my current gf online, and she happens to be just about the most amazing person I've ever met.

Good for you.

 

Who cares where you found your current partner, as long as you are both happy. Good luck, I hope it's as good as good can be. ;)

 

 

Greg.

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Ironically, Stealth, the act of hard throttle and cut-in is known amongst certain MC circles as 'stealthbombing' :D

 

As for the waving to each other, I find Captain Colour-Coded bikers dont wave to anyone because they are too busy trying to look awesome. When they look like clones.

 

I've never heard of any Ducati ostracision either. Except some comments at Matlock WAY back when the 996 was new, when I saw a group of about 20 748/996s turn up in a group. People were muttering about 'flash bastards' but thats about it. Although I did LOL when I heard all the dry clutches rattling like bags of spanners. I had an RXS at the time, my next bike was the V50 which was, ironically...dry clutch.

 

As for waving to bikers...I never used to get a lot from other bikers when I had the Yamaha FZR1000R-W ExUP Deltabox (woo, I love typing that!). It was too old for the Captain Condoms in their One-Piece W*** Suits, too new for the classic bikers, too sporty for the cruiser riders.

 

On my newer bikes I get LOADs of courtesy waves on the Cali, except from sportbikers. Griso, I think they wave because they can't tell what kind of bike it is. I generally get comments like "Nice but shame its a Guzzi" when I stop. On the Haotian, I get a lot of confused waves because people can't tell whether its a bike or a scooter!

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