Hedganian Posted April 12, 2011 Report Share Posted April 12, 2011 Unless she has a fetish and likes to be chained up in the yard? Someone out there must. Yeah, the problem is that the yard tends to be fairly open to view, and then the police get involved, and even if she *wants* to be chained there, you still get into trouble for "Outraging Public Decency" Buy a house with a basement, it's much more private. Invest in some good soundproofing, and you're golden. Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted April 12, 2011 Report Share Posted April 12, 2011 .... i'm talking about cooking you perverted bastards Be the modern man, cook for her you lazy sod Mine has skills, they all just involve bending, shaping and certain assets that i get to use. and you're golden .......showered . Maybe she likes that too. 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
Hedganian Posted April 12, 2011 Report Share Posted April 12, 2011 You sick *fruitcage*.... Link to post Share on other sites
danielsilva Posted April 12, 2011 Report Share Posted April 12, 2011 Be the modern man, cook for her you lazy sod I actually cook better than her ... i was of course talking about other "skills" that are usually performed in bed. .......showered . Maybe she likes that too. This is heading very fast to the "i seriously don't *fruitcage* want to know for *fruitcage* sake" territory. Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted April 12, 2011 Report Share Posted April 12, 2011 You sick *fruitcage*.... Come on, i was only joking. Though the fact that some people actually do that freaks me out somewhat. i was of course talking about other "skills" that are usually performed in bed. So long as she can say the same about you 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
Xaccers Posted April 12, 2011 Report Share Posted April 12, 2011 Come on, i was only joking. Though the fact that some people actually do that freaks me out somewhat. Coprophilia is so much worse. Link to post Share on other sites
boomheadshot (infidel) Posted April 12, 2011 Report Share Posted April 12, 2011 Fireknife I think you have clearly established that you have a strong sex drive, enjoy dirty women, and can think of an euphemism from almost anything. These "Attributes" shall be remembered by all who have read them and will thus no longer need reminding, hourly, of them. Please carry on good sir's. Link to post Share on other sites
Hedganian Posted April 13, 2011 Report Share Posted April 13, 2011 Rant: When Arnies has a "Database Error" for hours.... Link to post Share on other sites
danielsilva Posted April 13, 2011 Report Share Posted April 13, 2011 Coprophilia is so much worse. Dirty Sanchez Approves Of This ! Link to post Share on other sites
Gunmane Posted April 13, 2011 Report Share Posted April 13, 2011 Rant: When Arnies has a "Database Error" for hours.... ^This. Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted April 13, 2011 Report Share Posted April 13, 2011 Rant: When Arnies has a "Database Error" for hours.... Whole *fruitcage* day more like Where is Marlowe when you need him? These "Attributes" shall be remembered by all who have read them and will thus no longer need reminding, hourly, of them. You must be reminded every day Until i or Arnies dies. Anyway new rant: NHS. How come when i have an appointment for 11am i have to wait and am only one of two people in the waiting room. I mean it wasn't an important appointment but i saw medical staff with tags on walking around and not doing anything. Then when they do call me up as i pass to the practitioners room all the other rooms are empty? No wonder people complain when the medical staff spend most of the time prancing around and not actually seeing the patients at the right time. That and the woman behind the receptionist counter had one hell of a moustache, any more growth and she would have looked like Freddie Mercury Coprophilia I Google'd that, saw scat and clicked the back button so fast the computer nearly froze. 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
shmook Posted April 13, 2011 Report Share Posted April 13, 2011 That and the woman behind the receptionist counter had one hell of a moustache, any more growth and she would have looked like Freddie Mercury with your reputation, that probably gave you a twitch... i would have been posting sooner, this thread is my new favourite thing, but not been able to get on here all day due to aforementioned database errors! edit; new rant that t**t on the gilette adverts who bounces into the gym changing room, whooping and back slapping. if he tried that when i was there, he would probably soon be picking his teeth up with broken fingers.* for some reason, that ad really riles me. *if i bothered going to the gym any more edit 2, does the swear filter even work? t**t got through, and so does b*****ds. Link to post Share on other sites
Misfit Posted April 13, 2011 Report Share Posted April 13, 2011 The database error is an on-going problem that is currently in the process of being solved. Link to post Share on other sites
shmook Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 you guys are doing a sterling job about everything regarding the smooth runing of the forum, apologies if i sounded like i was whinging about being off here for a few hours like a petulent child, that wasnt the case. was just wondering what was going on, and im sure we all appreciate the effort everyone* puts into the runing of this place *meaning the mods, not the regs who manage to derail every thread at the earliest opportunity Link to post Share on other sites
spetsnazdave87 Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 Yeah and from a humanitarian perspective, Fireknife almost had to talk to someone today. Link to post Share on other sites
danielsilva Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 Yeah and from a humanitarian perspective, Fireknife almost had to talk to someone today. So THAT'S why our threat level rose a few levels ... Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 *meaning the mods, not the regs who manage to derail every thread at the earliest opportunity That's why i am here Yeah and from a humanitarian perspective, Fireknife almost had to talk to someone today. Was more interested in chatting to the hot 21yr old girl sat next to me, then i remembered where i was and thought, 'hang on a minute, why is she here?' So THAT'S why our threat level rose a few levels ... Trust me, i have a special level for that kind of thing 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
spetsnazdave87 Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 I meant a real someone but yeah ok Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 I meant a real someone but yeah ok She was real, she didn't have those clearly airbrushed out bits on her I can't wait til the GF gets back. That and free house for two weekends, it is true that good things come to those who wait. 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
Hedganian Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 Was more interested in chatting to the hot 21yr old girl sat next to me, then i remembered where i was and thought, 'hang on a minute, why is she here?' You were in the STD clinic, right? I can't wait til the GF gets back. That and free house for two weekends, it is true that good things come to those who wait. I've been waiting years. It's getting beyond a joke now... Oh, and shut the hell up, you smug git, or I will END you! Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 You were in the STD clinic, right? GUM clinic to be pedantic but yeah, i get a regular check ever 6 months. I just like to know and get about 60 free condoms each time. Oh, and shut the hell up, you smug git, or I will END you! Give it another 2 months and i will be single again myself anyway, somtimes bad things come to those that wait I've been waiting years. It's getting beyond a joke now... Hate to sound harsh her but have you actually been actively looking? What ways have you looked at finding someone? 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
Hedganian Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 It doesn't matter. Wherever or however I meet them, no matter how awesome things are, a few months later they leave for no good reason, and never want to talk to me again. I'm obviously doing something wrong. The last one chose going back to her abusive ex over staying with me, despite everything seeming to me to be beyond fantastic. *Sigh* I don't know. But never mind, if I'm lucky I won't have to worry about it for long after I leave for Afghan... Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 It doesn't matter. Wherever or however I meet them, no matter how awesome things are, a few months later they leave for no good reason, and never want to talk to me again. Look at it this way, you found someone, they showed an interest in you and you made something of it. Ok it didn't last but hell none of my relationships get past the 6 month barrier (well one has) but i don't worry about it, i just move on a look for the next person. However i always find someone in the oddest places and when i least expect it, annoyingly when i am not settled were i am, or in the money as it were. 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
Hedganian Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 Sorry, how is that supposed to make me feel any better? Link to post Share on other sites
paranoiddroid Posted April 14, 2011 Report Share Posted April 14, 2011 rant the dave advert with the guy hanging weights off his.... scares me. Link to post Share on other sites
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