Pdubyuh Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 If they ask for me I just say i'm my brother clearing the house after I died in a terrible accident/of a horrible illness ( depends on what mood I'min for how far i'll take it!) they soon hang up and then seem reluctant to call again... Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 I just tell them I am wearing nothing at all and jackin' it. Again never had a call back. Seriously while they are annoying they are fun to screw with as what are they going to do about it, complain to someone that you took the while they were cold calling you? 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
Skarclaw Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 be sure to tell them "this is a firm no" before the banter. Mate got fired from his job with cancer research uk cause he failed to get a "firm no" from the widow of the man he was asking to renew his direct debit! Link to post Share on other sites
hitmanNo2 Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 You can just imagine the type of utter bellend that would fire someone for that. On the other hand, perhaps they wanted him gone for another reason and just used that reason. Link to post Share on other sites
Skarclaw Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 You can just imagine the type of utter bellend that would fire someone for that. On the other hand, perhaps they wanted him gone for another reason and just used that reason. They (well at least in his case) have very strict targets. He was only there for 2 weeks and had two strikes (for not getting a "firm no") already so after that they got rid of him. It requires following the script very, very strictly. IIRC they were required to ask three times before it could be considered a firm no. Wouldn't want to do it myself!! Link to post Share on other sites
hitmanNo2 Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 Jeez. I can understand that kind of *suitcase* from double glazing or those kinds of people but a charity? Not cool. Wouldn't like to do that either. Link to post Share on other sites
Skarclaw Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 ha damn right. I went for an interview for a job selling double glazing door-to-door, must of been one of the worst jobs ever! The first warning sign is "you'd meet us here then we'd get you and other lads in a van to swindon..." the second and final was "you'd be paid strictly on commission - we can't guarantee you'd get paid" "I do need to get paid though..." He then tore up my application form in front of me and said if I changed my mind, he knew where to find me! Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 And people wonder why so many BS companies like that are using cheap immigrant labour that will work for next to nothing as it is better than being at home. Terrible. But then I expect no less. I recall working for a charity company that went door to door asking people to sign up. Now there are a few things wrong with this: 1. Most people will see this as an invasion of privacy and tell you to bugger off. 2. The few that don't give as and when they want to. 3. Running one charity like animal welfare or cancer around an area is fine. Sending six different ones and expecting results isn't going to work. 4. They expect you to pay for all travel at the last minute and then reimburse you. 5. If you do not meet the targets (which you have to be very obnoxious and pushy to get) you are fired. Basically they have such a turn over of students and low skill workers. I have been told by an ex-manager that they are funded by charities and payment so that they can keep the turnover going until they get the odd proper Del-boy type salesman that can be obnoxious and get the money, this way they make them a team leader and make them push everyone else to be that way. So, so, so glad that I move into my other job in less than three weeks. They even demanded I worked the third week rather than let me leave so I just took the and got paid for it. Anyone that wanted to help I just passed them off on to the other people so they kept the targets up while I provided a car for them and generally just had a laugh at their expense for being so arrogant in the first place. 'FrieKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
Habakure Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 Waiting to go to the pub. It's *bleeping* killing me. First world problem. Link to post Share on other sites
Cannonfodder80 Posted October 27, 2014 Report Share Posted October 27, 2014 Words 'FireKnife' In my experience these types are usually found at the back well out of the fight. Anyways, the fun year way I've seen this dealt with was by a team mate picking up said mouthy throbber by his webbing and shouting "you *fruitcage* move up" then throwing him forward. Strangely after this he kept quiet Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 I had a few doing it on the Sunday game I was at. I just laughed at them as it just lead to a lot of them getting stuck in a corridor and when a grenade went rolling by they tried to run. It was one of those 'two people trying to get out through a small door moment' but with about ten of them (two fat *bramston pickle*-s included). 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
scorch Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 Why do most people insist on calling up the very second we open and then complain that there is a queue on the phones? Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 Because people are generally *fruitcage*-ing stupid? Seriously, go to any Asda during peak times and you will see them all falling about, no clue what the hell they are doing, bashing into each other and generally being as thick as *suitcase*. I have now just moved to making a game of it, dodging past them and such. I even had a moment of sticking my head round aisle corners, target identifying and then dodge round, stupid people have their uses. 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
scorch Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 I find kids to be the worst in supermarkets. On the rare occasion I go into a supermarket these days, I want to be in and out with as little time wasted as possible. I can usually manoeuvre my way around the herds of sheeple quite easily, but the kids that are left to their own devices move erratically and unpredictably and, for myself, usually just below my line of sight. If you absolutely must take a brood of sproglets into tesco, keep them behaving in an orderly fashion. Nobody finds them endearing or cute and amusing. Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 I find the same, thankfully I go just slow enough to stop dead if need be. I have had children run into me and end up flat on the floor before but all that happened was the Dad laughed at them and picked them up before walking on. But I do my best to be in and out, waste as little time as possible and never stop moving. Some places are just a haven for morons and the quicker you are in and out the better. I would opt for home delivery but I find I don't spend a lot in one go, many time not enough to justify home delivery. 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
hitmanNo2 Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 You know those trolley lock ups for when you've done your shopping and want to have some food in the cafe? How about some cages where you can lock up small children? Put a couple of toys in there for them. Problem solved. Link to post Share on other sites
scorch Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 You know those trolley lock ups for when you've done your shopping and want to have some food in the cafe? How about some cages where you can lock up small children? Put a couple of toys in there for them. Problem solved. Genius idea. Make it mandatory, and we'll be on to a winner. Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 Don't they have those in big shopping centres anyway? I think they should be tied up outside on a lead at the 'pet stop', in fact leave the child there and take the dog in with you. I am sure it would be better behaved . 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
shmook Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 Don't they have those in big shopping centres anyway? I think they should be tied up outside on a lead at the 'pet stop', in fact leave the child there and take the dog in with you. I am sure it would be better behaved . 'FireKnife' Not our friends dog... A beagle, it was tied outside along with their retriever. It ###### the retriever off that much that it pulled the knot on the beagles lead to let it go. Said beagle runs into booths and starts throwing onions and lettuce around the veg aisle! They knew the retriever untied it as a bloke across the street watched the whole thing, killing himself laughing Link to post Share on other sites
Mike_West Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 *fruitcage* EVERYTHING. 1. I just got the mobile bill and it turns out that Orange tried to rip me off for 20% of the bill's value by turning on Orange World (free internet for the purposes of Facebook and a couple of local services nobody even uses) without my knowledge or consent. Luckily, now it's possible to turn it back off via their website. On my earlier contact, they didn't have that and the only two possibilities were the helpline, where their slaves claimed that I didn't have Orange World enabled, and their sales points, where they disabled... a different, free service. And I really have low tolerance for bull *suitcase* today. 2. Work. I'm surrounded by cretins, morons, retards, oxygen thieves, morons, idiots, brainless drones and morons. Not only I'm supposed to think for everyone, in addition to that it turns out that despite having monthly if not weekly meetings, the upper management HAS NO IDEA HOW THEIR *fruitcage* COMPANY WORKS. I'm *fruitcage* screaming. Link to post Share on other sites
Stuey Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 Not being funny, I think you need to get a new job. Like every other post you're complaining about it. I'm all for being proactive but some companies are populated by idiots to such a degree that it's better just to get out. Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 Maybe it is the only option and moaning about it saves going postal one day? 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
Cannonfodder80 Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 I never understand why people voluntarily takes their kids shopping with them, especially when you have both parents there. Surely it would be easier for one to stay home with the kids? I've got 2 24 supermarkets within 10 minutes walk from me so I go late at night to avoid the crowds of idiots (and quite a few of the night staff in tesco are very easy on the eye ) Edit: this reminds me of my favourite asda based you tube videos 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites
FireKnife Posted October 28, 2014 Report Share Posted October 28, 2014 Edit: this reminds me of my favourite asda based you tube videos Oh wow were those hilarious . I am still 50/50 on whether or not the Welsh one was genuine, I mean the guy was in Merthyr Tydfil. However I did just have to pop into Asda for a few things. I had to laugh at the woman that got confused by a blind persons helper dog and the other one that decided the best thing to do with their screaming baby was to take things away from it and this baby had a scream on it like something unearthly, a real proper Doctor Who alien kind of scream. 'FireKnife' Link to post Share on other sites
Tw1tch Posted October 29, 2014 Report Share Posted October 29, 2014 Went to buy one of those ceramic poppies from the Tower of London and they've all sold. Thought it'd be a nice bit to add to my memorial of the friends I've lost. So instead I'm going to split the money between a few charities. Help for homeless veterans (a friend of mine helps run this, check it out on Facebook) and Combat Stress for starters. Least something good comes out of it. Link to post Share on other sites
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