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My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!


Sledge

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You think of informing anyone in authority? Like maybe the Police?

 

OK I'll tell you what annoys me, the sodding RAF. But's it's not the bulk of the airmen it's the *fruitcage* Red Arrows? I mean come on, what a waste yes I know they can be good for recruiting but if we go to war I don't think a few red hawks and some dudes in red tracksuits will be of much use to us and it all comes from the Defence budget.

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People that fart in lifts!

 

If you are going out for a date, and you are nicely dressed, you sstep into a crowded lift, someone has to fart,,,, ruining the lovely stench of my aftershave....

And then it's always ome old lady who does it to.....

 

It's like a law

 

-someone must fart when entering a crowded lift...

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Well there is the thing about there only being 1 airport within walking distance from my house and it's the air force base.

 

There was also a bunch of camoflauged planes on the ground.

 

The Russians are coming the Russians Are COMING.

 

Paranoia gah

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Last night was the wierdest night in my life.

 

My girlfriend got off with her best mate 8 times, twice while sitting on my lap, and then I get moaned at for kissing the mate just twice on the lips...

 

I can see how I'm the guilty party, of course :blink:

 

Also, someone who I'd know for roughly two hours kept me up all night because she got really ###### and needed someone to stop her drowning in her own sick.

 

What else has been f**ked up lately?

 

Maybe that I've found out my best mate is gay, which just doesn't compute right now.

 

Maybe I could be annoyed at my brand new PDA being *fruitcage*ed up by random family members who decide my room would be a nice place to dump a 6 and 11 year old while I'm out for the night?

 

Maybe it's my dad replacing me with a new ''son'' in the form of his second cousin who is over from Estonia. He's one step away from airbrushing me out of photos and putting him in instead.

 

They even call each other ''Dad'' and ''son''.

 

''Oh Darren, while you were out, we gave your room away!''

 

EDIT: Even better - last Thursday I was offered to join in a threesome with one georgeous, leggy blonde, one very attactive brunette, and one decent enough brunette.

 

Of course, I couldn't join in. So dammit.

 

EDIT: I guess that would technically be a foursome.

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