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My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!


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I believe that's illegal.

There are certain different types of license and you have to have a certain one to have kids in there and there is a time limit on them.

 

When I was a kid the only pubs I went to were the officer's messes in the various camps I lived in, there was a certain expected standard of behaviour which - if not met - would result in the child's parents receiving a stern rollicking from the CO/OC/my dad.

Obviously my brother and sister and I were held to a higher standard but because there were established boundaries I don't recall ever getting in trouble at one of those.

 

 

 

What is bothering me today?

 

I was held up today on a country road by a bunch of clueless middle aged idiots on bikes.  They were riding line abreast at <10mph on a road with fairly bad sight lines each resplendent in the yellow vest of invulnerability and riding new bicycle shaped objects (MTB type) fresh from Halfords or similar.

There are more and more of them on the road recently since the weather is getting nice and it is getting on my nerves.  They will wake up tomorrow with a sore *albartroth*, the bike will go in the shed and never see daylight again.

 

What made it particularly irritating is that I was also riding a bike.

Usually inconsiderate bicycling morons are at least marginally considerate towards cyclists.

 

 

Top tip people, if you aren't riding off road (canal tow paths do not count) you do not need a mountain bike.

Hybrids that are based on mountain bikes are also a bad idea, they take the heaviness, bad gearing and small wheels of a mountain bike and add slick tyres.

Even in North Kent where the roads appear to have been strafed by a Luftwaffe pilot whom nobody told the war was over, even here where sinkholes open up and people just think it's a pothole.

Even here, you do not need any form of suspension on a bike for the road.

 

If your bum hurts after the ride it is because of 3 things.

1: You are fat, the fatter your *albartroth* the more it hurts, take it from me.

2: You are new, your *albartroth* gets stronger just like the rest of your body.

3: You aren't wearing proper shorts.  We don't wear them because we think we look good, we don't wear them because we like making people feel uncomfortable in our presence (although I do) - we wear them because the chamois is comfortable.

 

Get a road bike for the road, the clue is in the name, a second hand quality one will cost the same as a new piece of from Halfords.

If you absolutely must have a hybrid get one that is made the sensible way round, like mine, a steel reinforced cyclocross frame with 29er MTB wheels, road tyres, road handlebars and road gears.

Road gears have different ratios which (shocker) work better on the road.

 

Oh, and stay the hell out of my way!

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I think the cut off time in a pub that does not sell food is 7pm. If you have more than three drinks, your ability to reason is 'variable'. If I have a drink then my wife doesn't and vice versa. It does get on my nerves seeing a child asking their parent if they can go home (when the parent is busy getting drunk). One or two drinks isnt the same as 'drinking'. For me, having more than three drinks, you're merry and on the way to being drunk. Also, it depends on the percentage of alcohol. A quick drink is fine and I've done it myself but, again, I would drink and my wife wouldn't (or I wouldn't drink and my wife would).

 

Rant:- saying the swear word *fruitcage*, to a child, to tell them off, is pretty low.

Edited by Habakure
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Not long ago i was in a pub for some post family meal drink, we picked the nearest pub to the restaurant. It was a proper toothless drunk hole, but no defening music. Some woman came in with her kid, she grabbed a drink and started dumping pound coins into the gambling machine, she was there for the entire time we were and none of the locals seemed to mind. Pretty much the only thing she said to the kid was "we are waiting for daddy" in response to "can we go" the hole time.

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Kids in pubs is awkward. I work in one of the most profitable pubs in the UK and we see a huge number of families come in.

 

We welcome under 16 year olds provided they are accompanied by an adult and 16-17 year olds until 9PM. The official stance regarding consuming alcohol is that parties with young children may have two alcoholic drinks, but only provided they are eating in the pub. Unfortunately it doesn't happen. I see so many families come through the door just for mummy and daddy to get plastered while the kids wreak havoc. If I was manager I'd make damn sure the rules were adhered to, children need to be supervised and that require people thinking clearly.

 

Children are supposed to be accompanied by a responsible adult at all times but of course this doesn't happen, after all "You're here to keep an eye on them." No I'm not, I've got enough to deal with without having to keep someone else's children in check. Worst one was when a colleague came up to me and said a couple had asked us to keep an eye on their kids while they went to the shop, take the kids or one of them should've stayed. The bloody nerve, I'm not a babysitter.

 

The looks I get off some of the parents when I ask them or their children politely not to play around the stairs, with the games machines (why did the bloody designers make these so flashy grr) and not to run around the pub like its a playground. Generally its for their own safety or to comply with the law, we often have to carry food on large trays, which obscure our vision, particularly low down. Of course if I dropped hot soup on little Timmy I'd be the one in tbe wrong in the eyes of those parents.

 

We used to have a designated area for families, in fact we still call it the family area but now they're permitted everywhere (to the lament of many of our regulars) as we get so many come in. I don't mind the families coming in for lunch, in fact I find it somewhat pleasant if they know how to behave in public. All too ofteb though they're allowed to run amok.

 

That was a bit more of an essay than I intended...

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Luckily I don't drink so I have very little need ever to go in pubs.

 

Restaurants are just as bad.  My wife and I always book for after 2000hrs and yet there are still families in there with toddlers.

 

I'm sure I went to bed at 1800hrs - 1900hrs when I was a kid.

I was in a Mexican a while back at 2200hrs and there was a little kid doing screaming laps around the tables, his parents were so uninterested in him that I couldn't tell who they were until he sadly "tripped" as he went past me.

They got upset then.

 

Parenting, it's a job people.

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I was shopping once and there was a toddler running amok. He came running round a corner and went face first into my trolley just as I was at the end of the aisle. The parent came round and told me to "watch where you're *fruitcage* going you *beep*" so I replied with "Try keeping your pets on a lead"

 

 

My rant for the day: People who insist on making the decisions, but won't do the job themselves. 

 

Just had a woman phone up for something. She clearly wasn't in charge as I could hear her husband in the background saying "No, that's too expensive. Ask them if that's their best price. Tell them it should be cheaper. My mate says they're not worth that, we'll look around and call them back"

 

If her husband wants to call the shots, why isn't he making the call?

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If her husband wants to call the shots, why isn't he making the call?

 

1. Because he knows he is wrong.

2. Because his wife beats him.

3. Because he has no self esteem.

4. Because he is easily enraged by the simplest things.

 

I am sure there are many others but they often end up being the common ones. I must admit I don't like phoning some places for irritation of getting the typical *rickroll* you seem to get in some places but if you have to phone someone with an issue you have then you phone them, no two ways about it. The only thing worse is an email or a text message as that is just wussing out and admitting you don't have the balls to enter into a proper conversation with someone.

 

'FireKnife'

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As a parent of a 2 year old I have to agree that I don't understand parents who take their young kids out late and wonder why they act up from being overtired. If my boy stays up past 8 he turns into a right little *suitcase* as he's knackered so guess what, if me and the other half are going out in the evening we get a babysitter. Hardly rocket science is it?

 

My rant for today is the BBC commentator (along with some "news" paper reporters) slagging off Mo Farrah for not winning the London marathon yesterday. How about congratulating him? Afterall I doubt they could run 26 miles in 2 days let alone 2 hours 8 minutes

Edited by Cannonfodder80
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It is because in the eyes of many people there is only a 'number one spot'.

 

"Oh so you got a silver did you, well done, have a pat on the head, a slap in the face and get your *albatross* back out there and win a frigging gold".

 

I don't agree myself but then I am not the typical ranters that do the above kind of thing.

 

'FireKnife'

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Also, regarding kids misbehaving. It is generally well known that kids who get a good nights sleep will concentrate and behave better, thus it explained a lot when I went into Tesco at ten the other night, (I live in a city where it is not uncommon to find students at the university that cannot read or write basic english) to find it full of parents with very young children.

 

Was not surprised whatsoever.

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Sounds like a case of the green eyed monster. Further digging (ok, 2 minutes on Google) shows that the BBC commentator Brendan Foster's last major race was the 10,000 metres in 1980 where he came 11th, almost 40 seconds behind the winner

Edited by Cannonfodder80
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My rant for today is the BBC commentator (along with some "news" paper reporters) slagging off Mo Farrah for not winning the London marathon yesterday. How about congratulating him? Afterall I doubt they could run 26 miles in 2 days let alone 2 hours 8 minutes

 

Pretty sure it was his first marathon. Yeah he's a distance runner but a marathon is a hell of a different beast (at least that's what my dad tells me, I'm no athlete here).

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It is because in the eyes of many people there is only a 'number one spot'.

 

It is typical behaviour mostly found with non-achievers.

It's like dissing an F1 pilot for not finishing in the top 10. Because anyone can drive a car like that. (I think about 1.000 people over the world try to enter, each year)

Edited by NeoVeNoM
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I don't get this culture of slagging off sports stars for not winning. If they are competing at that level, they have already proved the,selves better than 99% of the population at their respective sports.

 

Absolutely, except if he is only better that 99% of the population then there are 70,000 people in britain and 70,000,000 people in the world better than him.

 

The London marathon attracts some of the best athletes in the world so if he came 8th then he is in the top 0.000001143% of the world on that day.

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Beggars. They seem to be like a plague in this city, 3/4 aren't even British. I work three jobs to stay above water, I'm having to dip into money saved in active service, so, no, I won't give you any money for the skag and special brew so *fruitcage* off you lying drug addicted *Ubar*.

 

There are people who need help, and institutions exist to help them, but these other people are *Ubarflock* not just because they are sponging scum, but because they create a stigma against people who genuinely do need help.

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My PC keeps blue screening and I can't seem to figure out what's causing it. Most things I've read point to the processor which I've adjusted the living hell out of to try and keep it stable. It varies so much on when it happens. I could have streamed Netflix for a few hours or a few minutes before it goes. If I didn't need to buy a load of mags for my G5 and save up for the War and Peace show, I'd be looking into new PC parts.

 

Stupid technology.

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Haha, got to love it when PCs keep BSoD-ing.

 

I must admit this is why I keep my laptop as standard as possible so as not to invite the possibilities of performance related BSoD-ing.

 

Though saying that I could do with a proper desktop for gaming and a new gaming controller.

 

'FireKnife'

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My PC keeps blue screening and I can't seem to figure out what's causing it. Most things I've read point to the processor which I've adjusted the living hell out of to try and keep it stable. It varies so much on when it happens. I could have streamed Netflix for a few hours or a few minutes before it goes. If I didn't need to buy a load of mags for my G5 and save up for the War and Peace show, I'd be looking into new PC parts.

 

Stupid technology.

Have you tried using whocrashed.exe? It's a great program - Analyses the minidump files that are created whenever a PC bluescreens, and specifically states in layman's about what the problem is.

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