Jump to content

My eye! Sweet Jesus, Ouch!


Recommended Posts

  • Replies 24.1k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Hedganian

    2252

  • shmook

    2033

  • FireKnife

    1686

  • scorch

    1618

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

Well, it's nearly Christmas! A time to laugh and joke, to sing and... who am I trying to kid? I hate this time of year, it always makes me irritable and angry. And that tends to spill into other areas

Wow, you've chosen to play today's edition of 'Wheel of Fortune!'   Let's see what you've won!   CONGRATULATIONS! For using homophobic language (because I'm sure as *suitcase* you're not calling m

ahhh.... that reminds me...   The losers who say that I'm wasting my money on airsoft... you spend $4000 on an ATV... and you accuse me of wasting money??

Posted Images

You think of informing anyone in authority? Like maybe the Police?

 

OK I'll tell you what annoys me, the sodding RAF. But's it's not the bulk of the airmen it's the *fruitcage* Red Arrows? I mean come on, what a waste yes I know they can be good for recruiting but if we go to war I don't think a few red hawks and some dudes in red tracksuits will be of much use to us and it all comes from the Defence budget.

Link to post
Share on other sites

People that fart in lifts!

 

If you are going out for a date, and you are nicely dressed, you sstep into a crowded lift, someone has to fart,,,, ruining the lovely stench of my aftershave....

And then it's always ome old lady who does it to.....

 

It's like a law

 

-someone must fart when entering a crowded lift...

Link to post
Share on other sites
Well there is the thing about there only being 1 airport within walking distance from my house and it's the air force base.

 

There was also a bunch of camoflauged planes on the ground.

 

The Russians are coming the Russians Are COMING.

 

Paranoia gah

Link to post
Share on other sites

Last night was the wierdest night in my life.

 

My girlfriend got off with her best mate 8 times, twice while sitting on my lap, and then I get moaned at for kissing the mate just twice on the lips...

 

I can see how I'm the guilty party, of course :blink:

 

Also, someone who I'd know for roughly two hours kept me up all night because she got really ###### and needed someone to stop her drowning in her own sick.

 

What else has been f**ked up lately?

 

Maybe that I've found out my best mate is gay, which just doesn't compute right now.

 

Maybe I could be annoyed at my brand new PDA being *fruitcage*ed up by random family members who decide my room would be a nice place to dump a 6 and 11 year old while I'm out for the night?

 

Maybe it's my dad replacing me with a new ''son'' in the form of his second cousin who is over from Estonia. He's one step away from airbrushing me out of photos and putting him in instead.

 

They even call each other ''Dad'' and ''son''.

 

''Oh Darren, while you were out, we gave your room away!''

 

EDIT: Even better - last Thursday I was offered to join in a threesome with one georgeous, leggy blonde, one very attactive brunette, and one decent enough brunette.

 

Of course, I couldn't join in. So dammit.

 

EDIT: I guess that would technically be a foursome.

Edited by ColDaz
Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use and the use of session cookies.