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True Story!


R22Master

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"It seems a man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the branch and wrote, "This iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag." While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to Wells Fargo. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he was not the brightest light in the harbour, told him that she could not accept his stick up note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said "OK" and left. The Wells Fargo teller then called the police who arrested the man a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America."

 

Anyone else seen this kind of stupidity? :D

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This is from a TV news a few years ago when a man try to rob a bank in Brazil. While waiting for the clerk to give him the money saw a security camera and open fire against it from is revolver. Fired five shots at close range missing them all and the camera continues to tape him.

 

During the fire a women start crying and the robber fired and hit her in the head but the 0.38 bullet slip and didn't cause any significant damage, just a headache. At this point, the genius notice that was without ammo and exits the bank when the police car arrived.

 

Stupid to not to wear a mask, bad shooter and a very unlucky guy.

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Blimey! :o

 

There was a guy that made the news here in the UK yesterday, tagged "the UK's dumbest bank robber". He robbed a bank, but removed his mask before leaving the building. Got his mug-shot caught on the CCTV camera and subsequently banded around national TV :)

 

A few more like that please, and the crime rate will be nil. :D

 

 

 

Here's another good one...

 

New York: As a female shopper exited a convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police had apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes Officer..that's her. That's the lady I robbed!"

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I remember someone robbed a bank. As he left the bank, a police car drove up and he bolted into the parking lot for his car. The police officers followed on foot as he dodged through the rows past cars. Finally the police caught up to him fumbling with the door of his car. He had locked himself out.

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i was watching something on the TV the other week about dumb criminals. There was one where this guy went to a store, pulled out a knife and demanded that the storeman hand over the cash. Of course if he'd been a little more observant (or a little less drunk) he might have realised that stood behind him was a cop who'd just popped in to buy some coffee. When the cop pulled his pistol on the man, the guy said that he was only buying a beer...

 

With a knife?

 

You work it out.

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I head about one where an armed robber came out of a bank and realised one of the bank security guards was following him. The robber didn't want to shoot the guard, but wanted to prove he was serious about using his weapon. So, he fired his gun in to the engine compartment of a parked car. Bit of a shame the car turned out to be his own getaway car, which subsequently failed to start :D

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I heard about a dude who wanted to pull an ATM machine out of the wall with his pickup-

truck. After putting the chain to his rear bumper and the other end to the ATM machine, he drowe off, heard a loud bang and he saw that the ATM machine was still in

its place. So the guy got scared that someone had heard him, so he fleed the crimescene. Hours later he was arrested because the bumper had come off and still had his license plate on it.

 

Immediately after getting in the line some less-intelligent robber had put his bacaclava on and pulled his gun out. After that he just waited for his turn and the bankteller had

time to call the cops.

 

If you have time: www.dumbcriminalacts.com

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Thats great. Here in my town some guy got arrested for a DUI. But he wasn't drunk. He got on a bus to my town from a neighboring town. Chugged down fourteen bottles of windex and then drove his truck into a tree. He later complained that cleaning elves were living in his head. Interesting story.

-EnZo-

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Best one I know of is the video of a UK bank robber thinking he was locked into a bank with the alarm going off. Took him about 3 minutes of slamming the door and trying to push it open until an elderly women walked in. The man simply had to pull rather than push and he was gone. There was another one just like this but rather the guy busted the door so he could get out haha.

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I recall one from the Darwin awards.

 

Guy walks into a bank to rob it. Alarm goes of so he aims his revolver at the cashier or security guard or whatever. "CLICK" round is a dud. Then the criminal does what every gun owner knows he should NEVER do. He looks down barrel and pulls the trigger again.....

 

Evolution theory at work ladies and gentlemen. :lol:

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A guy tried to break into a convenience store in the middle of the night. He tried to kick in the glass, but the glass just spider-webbed and didn't break. He tried and tried, but nothing. A camera facing the window from inside the store catches all of this. Bemused, the 'thief' sits down on a chair outside the store. Eventually he grabs a postcard rack and attempts to batter in the window with that. Again, he damages the window a bit more but still doesn't break it. He puts it down and tries to kick it again. This time he succeeds. He runs in, and rather than grabbing the cash register sitting right in front of him, he grabs 3 packets of cookies and runs out. During all of this the man's face was caught clear on camera.

 

A few minutes later the police turn up. It's clear the guy has left but they decide to sweep the area anyway. As they search the store, the guy returns for another helping. The police grab him and wrestle him to the ground.

 

How dumb can you get - getting arrested for nicking a packet of cookies... :rolleyes:

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Here's a few I remember from the Heroic Failures book.

 

Three robbers intended to rob a bank before closing time. The leader ran up to the door at full pelt.......and knocked himself out.

 

Turned out the manager had closed an hour early.

 

There's another one where two burglers broke into a high-tech corporation warehouse, and decided to steal this expensive-looking box on the wall. When they left, it made an extremely loud noise that they couldn't stop. They hit it, dropped it, tried everything. Finally, they dropped it in the river and ran away.

 

They must be the only burglers in history to steal the burglar alarm.

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Ok the treads 2 days old but i have a good one :P

 

There was one guy who tried to break into a closed shop by throwing a large stone at the window. However the window was made from saftey glass, and the stone bounced off & hit him in the side of the head knocking him out cold!.

 

Another one was when 2 chavs tired to rob a newagents, but didn't put eye holes in thier masks & walked into a postcard stand. The shop worker locked the shop & phoned the police....

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I used to have a weekend job working for a gym. The office had this really crummy old PC but apparently some people thought it was worth nicking so they climbed on the roof and smashed in a skylight.

Next morning I discovered a large puddle of blood amongst the glass and ofcourse the old PC was missing. I remember hoping the *beep* bleed out good-and-propper, but alas a week later he/they were back ....this time they nicked the printer that went with the PC?

 

All this mess for a grand total of 20 UKP tops......idiots

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okay, i got one. a guy is trying to rob a model place. he crawls through the vents, and gets in. he opens up a vent, and jumps through. he falls 10 feet, landing on a model of a battleship, the old kind with masts. he gets jabbed through the elbow. when he tries to get out, he finds out it is a double dead bolt, so it's key on both sides. he grabs a torch, and starts to burn off the lock. now, b/c of the fact it's a model shop, it has glue fumes. they alight, and explode. the man calls the firedepartment, and says when he was trying to break in, it got set on fire. the firement come, and he is arrested, with a 1/4 inch stick through his arm

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