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Why living in the future's...


Jett

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Q) Why is living in the future's a big load of *beep* you ask?

 

A) Quite simply: You will never be original.

 

 

You see, the problem with living in the distant future, amongst a cosmic myriad of wonderful and mysterious planets, is that there are always those who will compare your actions to that of the entire cosmos. Teachers mostly. And girlfriends.

 

For example, you might be the most exciting person in your whole town and enjoy admiration a respect from every single member of your community (airsoft or otherwise) but, when compared to the other eight-bazillion beings that litter the galaxy, you are a boring twot.

 

It’s quite depressing when you really think about it, the most important event in your life; the most exciting, mind-blowing epiphany you will ever have is a complete load of steamy urine when viewed on a galactorial scale.

 

Scientists call it the ‘House Party Effect’ because at any given social gathering there will always, without fail, be someone that is smarter / thinner / braver / funnier / a better shot / more attractive / less boring than you. They will have arrived at the party late, they will have brought a really nice wine, and they will be wearing a shirt that you were going to buy but didn't because you chickened out.

 

Think about it: in a time where there are so many beings spread across so many worlds, it is statistically impossible to be an individual. Every single thing you ever achieve has already been done by someone else. Everything you ever say, think, feel or do has been pre-empted by countless beings across the cosmos and all of them have done it far better and far earlier than you. No matter how original you think you are, there are at least a hundred thousand people who have beaten you to it.

 

Your latest joke - that won you a round of applause at your sister's wedding - was out of date the second you thought it up because someone already told it almost a year ago on a mining frigate nearly seven billion miles away. You're about six years behind the current fashion (and when you do catch up the 'in thing' will be to go naked). Your degree is worthless because someone half you age on the other side of the galaxy has just been awarded two, and he had much better hair. The laptime you just spent six hours putting in on Forza has already been beaten by an alien with a penis twice the size of yours who lives in a nicer flat and pays less rent.

 

So you listen to me, the next time someone comes up to you in a butchers, singing about how the future's all sunshine and butterflies, you remember this: It's not sunshine and it's certainly not butterflies, it's a big load of *beep*.

 

Of course, someone's already said all this before me but hey, I'm nothing if not original...

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zomg life has no meaning !

 

"hangs self"

 

on a serious note

 

No two people are the same everyone is unique and with limitless imaginations with which we can still create something unique and one of a kind.

 

giving up on something weather it be ambition or something your involved in because you fell its pointless and has been done before seems lazy and half *albatross*'ed.

 

thinking about stuff like that isnt healthy consult a doctor

 

 

... =P

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Thank you, Transvestite. Although someone has already PM'd me with those exact same points almost three hours earlier, proving that even in this timeline, you are late.

 

As as for "not funny", you clearly have a lot to learn about British humour... Sad can be funny too!

 

EDIT: This should all be taken, like human flesh, with a pinch of salt.

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You got a point there ... but then again... why care? To people, who you mean something to, things you do earn their sympathy/respect/whatever for doing it. The future is not a big load of cr*p when you have people that you're something special to.

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  • 2 weeks later...

i would love to debate... but i have to agree, to a certain extent... but if you think about it, you make a babie, it has a babie, then dies, then the babie has a baby and dies... etc. etc... the human race isnt really achieving much, apart from survival, and for what reason exactly?.. the only other reason to have sex is for fun, so our lives are just for fun?.. then why work? your gunna die anyway... depressing enough? :P

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The Future II - This time it's even more *beep*.

 

Okay, so maybe the original post came across as being a little bit pesimistic and a few people have taken it far more seriously than it was intended to be. I understand, some people are naturally upset and stuff like this brings it out of them. However, you can't escape the fact that my fevoured keyboard taps were all jam-filled truth and even a scientist would have trouble disputing my facts.

 

Anyway, back to the sharp end, while I was counting some dead rabbits at recent

Daphne & Celeste gig I uncovered another startling revelation about living in the

distant future that I think you'll all apreciate:

 

Living in the future will not make the pain go away.

 

How so? Well I'll tell you. When you think of the future, what comes to mind?

Hovering cars? Teleporters? Spaceships? Underwater alien civilisations? Strange

kitchen machines that dispense a variety of coloured paste? Of course, and you'd be spot-on, all of these things will quite-rightly exist in the future. But will they be worth it? Will they ultimately make the future worth waiting for? Will they? Will they tits.

 

Imagine you're a medieval peasant. (Some of you will find that easier than others I don't doubt.) You're getting on with your life, you're farming, making pots from clay, digging holes with your bare hands, filling them back in, avoiding leppers, the usual 11th century stuff of life. You do all this because it is what's expected of youl; you don't know any better.

 

But suddenly, while taking your least-ugly daughter to market, you mind begins to

wander and you begin to imagine things. You think about your life and the world you live in and your place in it. You think about the way the world works and how

everything fits together. You think about what life would be like if you had a stick to help you dig your holes rather than just scrabbling around in the dirt with your flayed hands.

 

A stick! *beep* in my eye, what a crazy idea. And a few more ponderings down the line you've got a shovel! And then a shovel with a leather-bound haft and a wrist guard to protect against stray chunks of mud! Then, before you know it you're living in a glass apartment buiding in the middle of Litchfield. Over-looking a Yates.

 

But are you any better off? Really? Has this tiresome wait for humanity to trudge on really brought you the happiness you so desperately crave and deserve? Is the way the world is now, with your Yates' and your two-tone shirts and your golf buggy and your Mondeo, really any better than it was 500 years previously? Well? Is it? Is it?

 

Don't you think, honestly, that sometimes you'd just like to go back to a time when all you had worry about was digging a few holes?

 

And you sit there, tippy-tapping on your plastic letter-board, dreaming of a time when there's an Xbox 540 and rental jetpacks and holographic vaginas. You fool. The future's not going to be any better than the world is now. There's just going to be more to look back fondly at...

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Anyway, back to the sharp end, while I was counting some dead rabbits at recent

Daphne & Celeste gig I uncovered another startling revelation about living in the

distant future that I think you'll all apreciate:

What...the....*fruitcage*....?

 

And you sit there, tippy-tapping on your plastic letter-board, dreaming of a time when there's an Xbox 540 and rental jetpacks and holographic vaginas. You fool. The future's not going to be any better than the world is now. There's just going to be more to look back fondly at...

My vagina's just fine the way it is, thanks.

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