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#1: "The ground is lava" drill.


#2: News story: The people of China are in mourning at the loss of an entire company of airborne troops who somehow forgot their parachutes for a synchronized drop. Budget cuts and the US are blamed.

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Chinese attempts at a Billion man synchronized jump, while so far unsuccessful, have progressed none the less. Officials report that the creation of a thread on an English airsoft forum, is a larger impact than any earth quakes caused by the jump (this is primarily attributed to the presence of an internet figure known as The Badger, a by product of a freak accident involving Tin foil, microwaves, jaffa cakes, and copious amounts of Kidscotland.)



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