Sypher Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 When i was younger, (a lot younger) i got caught taking a leek out of the back window of a bus by the conductor & while trying to get my -------- back in my trousers i caught the skin in my zip.... Hospital & 5 stitches later i got on to a bus to go home & the bus conductor said no p1ss1ng on my bus this time, as loud as he could. (The bus was full.) Talk about red face.... I also had red trousers... Link to post Share on other sites
Night_raven Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 well i did ask my girl tonight: All i asked her if she wanted a portion of my batterd sausage. I got slapped. Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Jebus Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 well i did ask my girl tonight: All i asked her if she wanted a portion of my batterd sausage. I got slapped. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> *Slap* Link to post Share on other sites
xRAZERx Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 Just use the razer special.... "I can touch my nose with my tongue and I know how to use it".... The amount of women that works on is great Link to post Share on other sites
ColDaz Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 The first time I ever went round to my current girlfriends house (the one buying me an MP5A5 ) I completely accidentally broke her trampoline (huge bloody trampoline) and also made her dad hate me for the rest of time. Don't ask any more questions. Link to post Share on other sites
Night_raven Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 *Slap* <{POST_SNAPBACK}> *gets camcorder and punches the living ###### out of jebus* ... right thats happy slap sorted. Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Jebus Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 *gets camcorder and punches the living ###### out of jebus* ... right thats happy slap sorted. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Takes the Crocodile, Shoves a bow tie down the glory hole, Adds the Hairy Blighter to the Eulogy, Twists the Dickie Bird with the Sausage crate, Throws on a few old Tea wells, And there you have it, One pile of Cat soured Muffin jackdaws. *There was a topic???* Link to post Share on other sites
ColDaz Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 Don't kill this topic too, I enjoyed the *fruitcage*ed-up one... Link to post Share on other sites
Night_raven Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 The first time I ever went round to my current girlfriends house (the one buying me an MP5A5 ) I completely accidentally broke her trampoline (huge bloody trampoline) and also made her dad hate me for the rest of time. Don't ask any more questions. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> LOL Fat Basterd ..... JOKE Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Jebus Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 Sorry, do you want a Monkey Tomatoe bhaji of sorryness? Link to post Share on other sites
expvideo Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 Remembering back to highschool, for a moment... story 1: I was in drama class (I know, I know... shut up) and rehearsing a part of the play in which I fall. The week before I had scraped up my knees sliding across a carpetted floor playing laser tag. So I fell to the floor, and re-opened the cuts. I saw a few drops of blood on my khakis and wondered if anyone would notice.. A minute later, the teacher asked if I needed to go to the nurse's office. I look down at my leg, and my right leg is litterally SOAKED in blood. So I walked to the office, and asked for a band-aid. They see my leg (looks like something out of a zombie movie... LOTS of blood) and look at me like I'm crazy thinking a band-aid would fix it. It did, since it was just a little cut, but it was kind of akward. story 2: I was joking with my girlfriend (at the time) who was very petite. I picked her up to can her (because I'm mean like that), and she slapped me across the face. I mean she SLAPPED me across the face. It echoed down the hallway. Let's just say both of my cheeks were red... Aaron Link to post Share on other sites
ColDaz Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 I actually landed on the springs that hold the thing tight, but meh. Link to post Share on other sites
Night_raven Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 I actually landed on the springs that hold the thing tight, but meh. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> oooooooooooo bet that was painful *shudders* Link to post Share on other sites
ColDaz Posted September 2, 2005 Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 Haha, not really, it was my feet that hit em. I couldn't see them under the cover, so... I dunno, things happen. The whole side fell off and down, bent the bars, and it was a race against time to fix it before her dad got home. I must give credit to my mate who is with her mate though, cause he did most of the work fixing it. Link to post Share on other sites
sniper_boi Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 my girl was over at mine and my parents were out and so was my bro and she asked me if knew how to handle these (if you know what i mean) and at that time there was some peeping bloody pervert looking into my bedroom window while my girl had her breasts out and we was both really embarressed because of that omg i've never been so embarressed in my life. Link to post Share on other sites
doc_newstead Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 she asked me if knew how to handle these (if you know what i mean) <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I'm afraid I don't. Could you elaborate further please? I assume you're talking about some kind of baked goods. Link to post Share on other sites
rizzo Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 my girl was over at mine and my parents were out and so was my bro and she asked me if knew how to handle these (if you know what i mean) and at that time there was some peeping bloody pervert looking into my bedroom window while my girl had her breasts out and we was both really embarressed because of that omg i've never been so embarressed in my life. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Stop. Talking. Link to post Share on other sites
squarepusher Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 Yeah, posts about your girlfriends and their breasts and touching etc. should embarass EVERYONE on an INTERNET FORUM. Unless it's totse. Seriously, something embarassing that won't make us cringe. Link to post Share on other sites
jak Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 Just ran into a glass door. Now my nose hurts. Link to post Share on other sites
Night_raven Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 Just ran into a glass door. Now my nose hurts. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> pwned Link to post Share on other sites
Soloman Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 My bloody toungue is still bleeding dammit. *Dies from lack of blood* Link to post Share on other sites
doc_newstead Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 http://putfile.com/pic.php?pic=9/24509245641.gif&s=x4 Link to post Share on other sites
Butter18c Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 I'm afraid I don't. Could you elaborate further please? I assume you're talking about some kind of baked goods. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> lol, funniest thing ive heard all day. Although it is only 10:30 here Link to post Share on other sites
nuclear_darkness Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 Well my most embarising moment happened just 2 days ago. My girlfriend and i were getting "intimate" in my room and when we were fisnished we realised that the door had been opened by someone...... it had to have either by my mum or my little sister..... so we go downstairs for dinner and no one said a word until i offered my girlfriend some food. My choice of words weren't the best, "would you like some more beef?" and my mom and my sister burst out laughing. Talk about going red Link to post Share on other sites
snake_goth Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 This is me at work. This is how I dress (me on left) and this is what I like (right). Period. I agree with Krazy L Aaron <{POST_SNAPBACK}> OMFG!! it's Snip3r!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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